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Momma said wonk you out

AGAINST TEXTING?

texts.jpg

There comes a time in person's life when their inner ear ceases to detect the pitch of crankery. When "music today is just noise" sounds like a true statement and not an admission of age, and when "I'll take the purple Crocs" does not terrify the speaker with its strong undertone of coming sexual obsolescence. Reading Louis Menand's New Yorker analysis of text messaging, it would seem Menand, an often gorgeous author and critic, has reached that phase of crankery. Consider:

The texting function of the cell phone ought to have been the special province of the kind of people who figure out how to use the television remote to turn on the toaster: it’s a huge amount of trouble relative to the results. In some respects, texting is a giant leap backward in the science of communication. It’s more efficient than semaphore, maybe, but how much more efficient is it than Morse code? With Morse code, to make an “s” you needed only three key presses.
This is rather like saying the car is too much trouble as compared to the train because you have to drive it yourself. If we all had Morse code receivers in our pockets, maybe we'd find the language of more use. But the innovation of text messaging is tied up in the portability of cell phones, not the existence of T9. Everyone recognizes the inadequacy of the numerical keypad -- it's why phones are evolving towards keyboards.
This is the new decorum in communication: you can be sloppy and you can be blunt, but you have to be fast. To delay is to disrespect. In fact, delay is the only disrespect...There is no socially accepted excuse for being without your cell phone. “I didn’t have my phone”: that just does not sound believable. Either you are lying or you are depressed or you have something to hide. If you receive a text, therefore, you are obliged instantaneously to reply to it, if only to confirm that you are not one of those people who can be without a phone. The most common text message must be “k.” It means “I have nothing to say, but God forbid that you should think that I am ignoring your message.”
This, too, is weird. It reads like Menand overheard a teenager venting on the subway and elevated her anger over a boyfriend's tardy reply into a Rule. When he says "the most common text message must be 'k,'" the telltale "must" gives away a fairly glaring lack of evidence. Not only doesn't he know if the most common text message is "k," but the next sentence is obviously wrong: "K" is short for "ok," and it's a statement of agreement, like "yes." If I text a friend to have dinner at 7, no return text means I won't show up. "K" means he'll be there, and so will I. My friend is actually saying something quite concrete -- he will attend, at the time and place indicated -- and doing it with a single consonant. Menand is saying something that's quite light, a cranky mental gesture disguised as a point, and needs 20 words to do it. Score one for texting.

Menand makes some fair points, too. The ways in which international texters are adopting English will certainly have some fascinating linguistic impacts. It's true that some folks like texting because they loathe talking. But what Menand text messages are supplementary communication. They facilitate actual meetings and allow for the transmission of trivia and observations and notes that wouldn't be worth an actual conversation with all its formalities and disruptions. Plus, the kids like texting. Menand should talk to a few of them, and calm down about what they're doing on their cell phones. He's too good and important a critic to waste his time and talent simply being a grump.

Image used under a Creative Commons license from Veronica Belmont.



COMMENTS

Sorry, for the life of me can't figure out what the utility of text messaging is. Certainly 75% of what's communicated in texts is better/faster/easier communicated in a phone call. And if phones are moving toward full qwerty keyboards, what's the advantage over an old-fashioned email? Certainly not price.

All in all, I'm convinced that the rise of text messaging is just a depressing reminder of the effectiveness of American Idol of selling crap to kids.

Yeah, this was a baffling one, even by the New Yorker's typical "Get off my lawn!" standard of technology and youth-culture analysis. Menand is even worse at being Tom Wolfe than Tom Wolfe is these days.

X, sometimes it's rude or difficult to make/take phone calls but easy to text. In a crowded movie theater or at a concert, for example. Your point about price structure is well taken, but unless you already shell out for Web access on your phone (and everyone else you'd need to contact does, too), it's probably cheaper and easier to text.

X, sometimes it's rude or difficult to make/take phone calls but easy to text. In a crowded movie theater or at a concert, for example.

Or in the middle of a complicated arms deal involving several layers of double and triple agents. If not for texting we wouldn't have had The Departed. Doesn't that count for something?

Well, music today is just noise, at least in Los Angeles where ChearChannel controls virtually all of the FM rock stations.

Hate phones. Hate cell phones even more. Hate texting.

I just hate having my train of thought interrupted, especially while working. And that's all that phones do -- just about every feature is designed specifically to interrupt me.

That's why I'll always by an e-mail guy.

I prefer texting because it doesn't involve actually calling someone to say something takes only 3 seconds. In a phone call, the statement would inevitably be followed by...
"OK. Is that it?"
"Yeah. That's it."
"That's all you called me for?"
"Yeah. That's right."
"Ummmmmm. That's weird. You don't have anything else going on?"

At this point, the original caller will undoubtedly feel obligated to continue the conversation. A pointless conversation could end up wasting 15 minutes of each of their lives simply because of the absence of text-messaging.

I'm with PapaJijo. I like having complete control of my communication. I drew the line at a cell phone long ago. I use one occasionally, but only occasionally, and no-one can contact me using one.

I like that. I don't like the notion that someone else can interrupt me anytime they feel like it.

Texting is just one more thing turning us into a nation of ADD patients. I hate it when someone answers a cell phone while I'm talking to them in person, and I hate it even more when they text someone while I'm talking to them. Rude beyond belief.

If that makes me a crank, so be it. There's such a thing as too-much-communication, and texting/cell-phones took the entire business over the line.

I used to be anti-text messaging. But I discovered so many conveniences to it.

For one, if you're in an area where reception is spotty, you only need a few seconds of good reception to get your message out, as opposed to uninterrupted minutes, like with a call.

For another, texting does allow for conversations in areas where talking wouldn't be approved. I know nobody gives me a second glance if I text on the subway, but give me a dirty look if I even have a 30-second conversation on the phone.

Though I will say that I can't stand T9. But that's why I always just type (and why I eventually got a smartphone - goodbye forever, T9). Nothing obligates a text message to be composed with T9.

Finally, I'll say that nearly all pop music is noise. There's plenty of great music out there - it's just almost never on the radio (though I'll admit to liking The Killers, Jimmy Eat World, and a couple of Coldplay songs).

The most useful thing about text messaging is that it's often "fire and forget". Often my friends and family don't have their mobiles on, or on them, or are in the underground or at a noisy pub or nightclub where they can't hear the ring. Not all of them have voicemail, and even if they do, they'll have to actively check it. So instead of calling again and again until they pick up, or leaving a message and not knowing when they'll receive it, sending a text means I know they'll see it the next time they have their phone on in an area with reception, ie the soonest possible moment I could have called them.

Texting, like email, prevents me from having to actually talk to people, and so though I am quickly passing into technology obsolescence I will continue to satisf the old-man crankiness with social interaction that I was apparently born with.

However, I am quickly losing my patient with text-speak, as there are numerous applications that make it possible to text in complete sentences just as quickly. That's something you whipper snappers had better work on.

I do happen to think that automobiles are too much trouble because one has to drive them! I also disdain text messages and casual use of cellular telephones, even though I came of age during their emergence as ubiquitous accessory. Very recently I saw a man eating dinner at a restaurant who wore one clipped to his ear the entire time; I wanted to slap it off of him. I don't deny that they have some utility, but they seem to enable or encourage astounding rudeness and vapidity.

The only time that I reliably carry my, curiously enough, is when I travel by train, lest my mother become fretful beyond reason.

sometimes it's rude or difficult to make/take phone calls but easy to text. In a crowded movie theater or at a concert

Oh, yeah, I'm constantly frustrated by my inability to make phone calls while watching a movie or listening to a concert.

Guess I'm old-- I just never took to texting. Don't like the abbreviations or the lack of, well, writing style, given its brevity. I can be abrupt enough on the phone or in an email, and I loathe trying to type on a tiny keyboard with my thumbs.

Anyway, I didn't even bother to get the texting add-on with AT&T (love my iPhone so far, though).

I have been very patient with your insufferable habits of being famous, young, brilliant, half my age, knowing more than I'll ever forget and being youthful but this is too goddam much.

Get off of my lawn !

However, I am quickly losing my patient with text-speak, as there are numerous applications that make it possible to text in complete sentences just as quickly. That's something you whipper snappers had better work on.

I'm seeing more and more signs (on teevee, billboards, etc.) that text speak is taking over civil discourse.

My thought for the day: has any invention since the printing press happened that caused a more rapid disconnect between spoken language (english) and written language? English is hard enough without having even more divergence between the written and oral discourse. Too many '3s' and 'Zs', etc.

Oh, the children....

Music nowadays suck.

It's the asynchronus aspect of the communication, as well as the low bandwidth.

Texting makes it possible to have a coversation/make plans without both people needing to be free at the exact same moment. And yes, that happens a lot more than just "in a movie theatre" (where I turn it off completely). How about: in meetings, going to the restroom, in another conversation, driving, playing a game, exercising, etc.

It is NOT intended to replace the call... it supplements it in a great way. Email supplements calls as well, but requires being at a computer.

I frequently use text-messaging because my urban-non-driver life means I'm surrounded by people almost all the time. As I hate people who get on their phones in public to loudly have a completely mundane conversation, texting (and emailing on my Blackberry) seems infinitely more polite.

That said, I hate 'txt-spk', and have the same horror for it that I did for email-speak back in the early days of email, when it was seemingly okay to type all in caps, or all in lower case, or with no punctuation whatsoever, because - email! Thank god those days are (mostly) gone, and with Qwerty keyboards appearing on many new phones, hopefully most text-speak will disappear too.

Tito nailed it; it's the asynchronicity. Which is funny, since that's something that Menand completely misunderstood..

How about: in meetings, going to the restroom, in another conversation, driving, playing a game, exercising, etc.

Why would you be texting while you are in a meeting, having another conversation, or driving? Shouldn't you be paying attention to what you're doing? As for the restroom, well that's just weird.

Some scenarios where texting is useful:

1. You're on the subway. You're running a bit late and want to let your friend know, but since you're underground, your reception is spotty and you probably would get cut off in mid-call.

2. You're in the library and want to let your friend know that you found the book they asked you to check out for them.

3. You're meeting friends at a loud bar and want to let them know where you're sitting.

4. You aren't near a computer and you want to let someone know something, but you're in the middle of stuff and don't have time for a whole conversation.

5. You're at your computer; your friend isn't near one. Your friend calls you and asks you to look up a phone number for her, but she doesn't have a pen handy and she thinks she won't remember it if you just tell her over the phone.

Etc.

The big problem with text messages is that the abbreviations are telegraphic. Curse you Samuel F. B. Morse.

Email and text messages are great because you can ask people simple questions, and at their convenience people can give you simple answers. I wish I could say the same about voice mail, but I have a neurological problem which makes it nearly impossible for me to interpret recorded speech as language.

Another neat thing about text messaging is that when you call information, they'll text you the directory entry so you can put it in your phone book at your leisure.

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About Ezra Klein

Ezra Klein is an associate editor at The American Prospect. An archive of his articles for The American Prospect can be found here.

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