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IT'S..IT'S PEOPLE!
Out in Beverly Hills, a plastic surgeon named Craig Allen Bittner pioneered a new way to cut fuel costs: Human fat. He would convert the excess fat from liposuction operations into biodiesel that fueled his Ford SUV and his girlfriend's Lincoln Navigator. Indeed, a gallon of fat will get you about the same mileage as a gallon of fuel, provided your car is properly outfitted to burn it. Gross, but certainly environmentally friendly. Forbes reports that the Bittner is under investigation by the public health authority, as it's "illegal in California to use human medical waste to power vehicles."
Seriously? Is there literally a law saying that, or is it just illegal to use human waste for any purpose save disposal?
COMMENTS (12)
I'm not challenging your assertion, but could you expand a bit on why you see burning human fat as environmentally friendly?
Posted by: RWB | December 23, 2008 11:45 AM
Given that the recession is starting to hit the cosmetic surgery business, I'd expect the supply of lipofuel to decrease. Beverly Hills surgeons will be reduced to trading in their Mercedes for a Ford Focus.
Posted by: CParis | December 23, 2008 11:53 AM
Using human fat seems like starting down a slippery slope - or something.
Actually, its a plot to acclimate the public to smell of cremated bodies when the great unemployed purge begins to cure the depression.
/snark
Posted by: JimPortlandOR | December 23, 2008 11:58 AM
what will they think of next?
perhaps making soap?
lampshades?
my mistake.
that has already been done before.
Posted by: jacqueline | December 23, 2008 12:21 PM
The first rule about burning human fat for fuel is you do not talk about burning human fat for fuel.
Posted by: Persia | December 23, 2008 1:03 PM
Is the exhaust green? Do they only refuel on Tuesdays?
Posted by: ajw_93 | December 23, 2008 1:14 PM
Seriously? Is there literally a law saying that, or is it just illegal to use human waste for any purpose save disposal?
Ha...no, I don't think so. The California Health and Safety Code 118215-118245 lists the various accepted means of disposal, among which "burning for fuel" is not one. I'm sure all other states have similar provisions. You would probably need to pass a law affirmatively legalizing using it as car fuel.
Posted by: Aristidies | December 23, 2008 3:29 PM
Oh, crap. Well, can you deep-fry with it?
Posted by: Sanjay | December 23, 2008 3:49 PM
I'd bet there's not a law that says "it's illegal to use human waste to power a vehicle", but I would also bet there is a law saying "it's illegal to use anything to power a vehicle except these...." and since human fat isn't on the list, it's therefore illegal.
Posted by: Misty Fowler | December 23, 2008 3:57 PM
I think Aristides has it. After all, there are people who convert leftover cooking grease (some of which is often animal-based) into fuel, and I've never heard of anyone being arrested for a bacon-powered automobile.
Posted by: 32_Footsteps | December 24, 2008 2:23 PM
I believe it's known as the "Fight Club" law.
Posted by: KathyF | December 24, 2008 3:41 PM
Craig Allen Bittner: Putting the green in Soylent Green.
Posted by: Greg Sanders | December 24, 2008 7:56 PM