THINGS YOU NEVER LEARNED ABOUT CHANUKAH FROM YOUR HIPPIE RABBI.
This newsflash popped into my inbox from one Rabbi Yehuda Levin (on the Christian Newswire no less!), claiming to speak on behalf of the Orthodox Rabbinical Alliance of America:
Chanukah was historically and remains a celebration of the victory over Hellenistic Jewish social liberals and the homosexual agenda.
There are a lot of theories about the meaning of the holiday, but this one really takes the cake latkes.
--Sarah Posner
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COMMENTS (6)
Interesting quote, but aside from the homosexual agenda bit, wasn't the Hasmonean revolt one against Greek culture? And there was the whole "cleansing of the Temple" aspect, which implies something along those lines.
Posted by: Quiddity | December 7, 2007 2:02 PM
Creepilly enough I think he's not wrong. Its one reason why I don't much like Channukah and much prefer celebrating saturnalia a few days later. What was the victory of the Maccabees but a triumph over assimilated jews--friends, neighbors and kinsfolk who were mainstreaming themselves into the surrounding culture? Its always given me the creeps, even if the latkes and things seem harmless.
aimai
Posted by: aimai | December 7, 2007 2:03 PM
actually it is sort of true... it was in equal parts a victory over the outside occupiers and also the liberal-progressive hellenizing assimilating and/or reform Jews of their day.
The Macs were indeed the right wing back to orthdoxy of their day. And their rule became increasingly opressive and unpopular making later take over by the Romans all the easier.
...and so it goes.
A good piece on this in Slate a few years ago.
Posted by: DrSteveB | December 7, 2007 2:05 PM
And neither side had any potatoes, either!
Posted by: Invigilator | December 7, 2007 2:11 PM
Thanks, Jews, for inventing the whole homophobia thing and then selling it to those Xian and Muslim dumbasses.
Posted by: Anonymous | December 7, 2007 3:21 PM
kids these days never learn the real stories.
you see, it all started because they thought they only had enough oil to burn one faggot....
Posted by: kid bitzer | December 9, 2007 4:51 PM